Happy Veterans Day
On this solemn and important day, November 11th, we pause to honor and thank the extraordinary men and women who have served in the United States Armed Forces.
Regardless of when or where you served, your commitment to duty and country represents the very best of American Spirit. You answered the call, enduring hardships and making sacrifices that only a few can truly comprehend, all to protect the freedoms we cherish.
More than just a holiday, Veterans Day is an opportunity to reflect on the meaning of service and to acknowledge the immeasurable debt we owe you.
Thank you for your courage. Thank you for your resilience and unwavering dedication. Your patriotism and legacy are woven into the fabric of our nation’s strength.
We Salute You.
Respite Care: A Necessary Break That Makes You A Better Caregiver
Providing care can be a demanding job, and it can be especially difficult when the person you are caring for happens to be family. Caregiving is a 24/7 commitment that can lead to exhaustion, stress, and even burnout; if you’re feeling overwhelmed, it is important to remember that taking a break is absolutely essential, and this is what Respite Care can provide.
Respite Care is temporary, short-term relief for primary caregivers, it is critical when you feel your batteries running low, allowing you to focus, recharge, and return to your role with renewed patience, energy and overall perspective.
Caregiver burnout is an emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion that can be the result of prolonged stress. Symptoms often include fatigue, anxiety and the inability to stay focused. Taking care of yourself is important, and regular breaks, even short ones, are needed to ensure your own health. By using Respite Care, it is a preventative measure, ensuring you can continue to provide high-quality care without resentment. When you are stressed, patience can run thin. Respite care provides you the opportunity to step away, manage your stress, and reconnect with your loved one on a personal level rather than just as a task manager. When you feel refreshed, you have more emotional capacity to be fully engaged, loving, and supportive.
When you are caring for a senior, your own needs often take a back seat to their needs, which can lead to missed appointments and errands, loss of quality time with family and friends, and all too often, lack of a good night’s sleep. This can take a toll on your health, so it’s not something you should neglect.
The benefits of Respite Care are that it not only provides you with a break, but it is beneficial to your loved one. Often, by providing a change of caregiver, it can be a positive change of pace and can be helpful in maintaining routines but might also offer different perspective and solutions. Maybe doing things a certain way is just done because it’s how it has always been done, and by taking a step away, it allows time to assess the needs of both caregiver and loved one. By providing you with a competent alternative in the short-term, it can provide you the peace of mind that you have a trusted backup when you need time for yourself. Respite Care is provided to assist you with a quality professional caregiver that can take care of your loved one’s ADL’s (activities of daily living) such as bathing, dressing, light housekeeping and meal preparation, as well as medication reminders and, in some cases, appointments and errands.
Respite Care is a powerful tool in any caregiving toolkit. Often people will wait until they’ve hit the breaking point to enlist the support of others. Searchlight Senior Services of Norwell offers Respite Care by providing the highest quality caregivers that take pride in providing the very best care to all of our clients. Don’t wait, you are making an investment in your own well-being and ensuring the quality of the long-term care you are providing.
Client-centric care
At Searchlight Senior Services, we believe that the primary goal of any home-care business should be to provide care tailored to the individual client's needs, rather than being solely driven by metrics such as volume or business structure. While questions about rates and minimum hours are important for potential clients and referrers, we find they often shift the focus away from the client and onto the business itself.
Home care is a service rooted in human need, not just a transactional commodity. When a business prioritizes metrics designed to increase profit or streamline procedures for efficiency, it's crucial to consider the potential consequences. For example, focusing heavily on caregiver utilization and billable hours can lead to caregivers being rushed from one appointment to the next, leaving no buffer time for unexpected client needs.
Our philosophy is to focus on person-centered metrics and qualitative outcomes, using metrics as indicators of care quality rather than just financial efficiency. We prioritize continuity and trust, which are reflected in stable caregiver assignments. This approach demonstrates our understanding that care is personal and intimate, allowing us to build deep rapport and a comprehensive understanding of the client’s personal needs, preferences, and complex medical history, thereby prioritizing both safety and comfort.
While sending a caregiver for a shorter duration might not always be ideal from a financial metrics perspective, we believe other factors are more important. Even if a caregiver initially spends less time with a client due to time limitations, we are actively building rapport and a sense of security. Overcoming physical challenges involves not only restoring the body but also building confidence, which requires trust—and trust takes time.
I often describe our care as client-centric. This means we avoid adding to a client's stress by dictating a minimum number of hours they must accept to receive our services. We are providing a service for the client, and if that means taking more time for them to feel comfortable, that is precisely what we provide.
Loneliness: staying social, not being a butterfly
Caregivers frequently observe feelings of loneliness in their clients, even when clients are surrounded by people. This raises the question: can one experience loneliness even in the presence of others?
While it may seem contradictory, loneliness is an emotional state that can stem from various factors such as physical impairments, the loss of loved ones, losing a driver's license, moving to a new home, or other significant life changes. It can also arise from feeling unheard or disconnected. It's crucial to understand that loneliness is unique to each individual, and therefore, there isn't a universal solution. While routine and consistency are important, patience is paramount in combating and preventing isolation.
Loneliness is often compounded when a person is naturally shy. Shyness is not a desire for isolation but rather a form of social apprehension. Traditional solutions that involve large gatherings or forced engagement often backfire, causing the individual to withdraw further. Therefore, the most effective strategies should focus on creating low-pressure, high-quality social interactions that align with the senior's comfort zone.
Prioritizing one-on-one or small-group engagements within a familiar environment can help reduce overwhelming stimuli. This approach allows individuals who are shy to feel safe enough to share and connect on a deeper level. The quality of the interaction—feeling seen and heard—is often the antidote to loneliness.
Helpful approaches might include quietly enjoying a cup of coffee or tea together, or having a friend or caregiver watch a movie or show. Engaging in a hobby or game, where the focus is on the activity rather than the individual, provides a "shared purpose" that can circumvent the anxiety of direct conversation. By focusing on the activity, pressure is alleviated, allowing for a more natural social interaction guided by a structured social activity.
By facilitating small, purposeful, and socially comfortable opportunities, and by exercising patience and providing structure for those who might be shy, we can prevent loneliness from leading to isolation. True connection is found by opening the door to the warmth of a meaningful connection and the enduring strength of community.
Remember, loneliness doesn't have to lead to isolation. We are not aiming to create a "social butterfly"; rather, we strive to build trust as companions who are attentive to our clients' needs. We take the time to listen and help foster a sense of comfort and security by allowing them to progress at their own pace.
Meaningful connections
When meeting new people, there's a natural inclination to feel a stronger connection with those who share similarities with us, as this can unconsciously validate our own sense of self and foster trust. However, as caregivers, we frequently interact with individuals who may have very different appearances, beliefs, and life experiences, often being much older than us.
This inherent bias, whether subconscious or due to a feeling of ease with perceived similarities, can sometimes make it challenging to cultivate a meaningful connection. Yet, connections founded on trust are paramount in caregiving. When an individual feels truly invested in their well-being, it significantly contributes to a more positive mindset regarding their care, health, and progress.
There is substantial research supporting the "mind-body connection," demonstrating a strong link between a positive mindset and improved physical outcomes. This can manifest as shorter rehabilitations, faster recovery, and even quicker wound healing rates in individuals with strong emotional wellness—something I have personally witnessed.
When I meet someone I will be caring for, my approach is to look beyond their physical condition or the circumstances that led them to need assistance. Instead, I make an effort to get to know them as individuals. I might ask about their interests, past professions, or discuss topics like sports or music, perhaps prompted by something I observe in their home. My goal isn't to distract, but to genuinely understand the person I am assisting. Through these conversations, we learn about each other, uncover shared interests, and often discover common ground that isn't visible or based on any preconceived notions.
By making a meaningful connection, positive mindsets and improved outcomes are more achievable, and what could be more validating than that?
Why I Care
By Abby Burns
Sitting down at a kitchen table, I found myself shaking and beginning to cry as I thought “What if something bad happens?’ “I can’t do this. I am not the right person for the job.” A 96 year old man eating tomato soup in his cozy little kitchen was terrifying. It was my first time filling in as a caregiver and I was so nervous. The role of caregiving was so new to me and I didn’t really have any prior experience looking after anyone, not even babysitting.
Looking back, it is funny to think that I was overwhelmed by accompanying one of my most beloved clients Jim (actually, Jim became more like family), but it was the truth. Caregiving has become an extremely rewarding aspect of my life. Having the privilege of listening, talking, assisting, and sometimes even advocating for my clients has impacted my life in such a positive way. Being able to prioritize the needs of others is what I strive to do. Knowing that I can help someone with some aspect of their day is deeply meaningful, no matter how big or small. Having a client say “I’m glad that you’re here with me” at a doctor’s appointment or a client introducing me as a “friend” are moments that have filled me with so much satisfaction for my profession.
Searchlight Senior Spotlight
We are excited to announce that Searchlight Senior Services has been offered a local cable TV show, "Searchlight Senior Spotlight," through Harbor Media in Hingham. Our goal with this show is to provide valuable resources to the senior community.
Our first episode will focus on the topic of faith, exploring what having faith means and the significant role it plays in caregiving. Each subsequent show will cover a new topic, and we welcome suggestions from the community for future discussions that would be helpful to seniors and their families.
As a member of the Norwell Chamber of Commerce, we are also happy to promote community events and local businesses on our show. In the coming months, we will be reaching out to businesses and community members to gather useful tips, strategies, and options that can benefit seniors.
If anyone would like to offer suggestions for show topics, please email Abigail Burns:
ABurns@searchlightseniorservices.com.
As episodes are completed and aired, we will be posting a link for those that may not have access via their cable provider, so please look for updates starting in November 2025.
How it began…
My father, a strong and independent man, was diagnosed with an abdominal aortic aneurysm requiring surgical repair. What followed was a prolonged recovery marked by strokes and eventually dementia, leading to a critical need for constant care and supervision. Despite my prior experience as a caregiver, my most recent work in finance, specifically Retiree Investment Services, had really not prepared me for the profound challenges our family would face.
His concern, even amidst his own diagnosis, was always for my mother. He wanted to ensure her well-being above all else, which I believe led him to ask me to be his healthcare proxy. After his surgery, a two-week hospital stay followed by a stint in rehab., he returned home significantly weakened. Activities we often take for granted—like getting up from a chair, showering, or using the bathroom—now required assistance. This experience highlighted the immense challenge of maintaining a loved one's dignity and privacy while providing intimate care.
It was during this time that the true meaning of respect became clear to me. I had to get creative, using simple strategies like having a towel ready when he needed to use the bathroom, to cover his privates, talkiing about things I knew he was passionate about as a way of distracting him was another tactic. Yet, I knew, in spite of his love for family, and the Boston Celtics, there had to be a more effective and dignified approach.
Caring for my father revealed how deeply personal daily routines are. Tasks like getting out of bed, fetching a drink of water, or going to the store for necessities are integral to an individual's autonomy. After his surgery, even these small details became part of our family's shared routine, demanding more time and effort than any of us had anticipated. My father, a truly generous man who would never hesitate to help others, found it incredibly difficult to accept help himself.
While professional assistance might have eased some burdens, I believe he still would have resisted. Recently, my daughter, who is also a caregiver, shared an insight that resonated deeply: "It is just semantics, but sometimes changing the way you say something can really make the difference. For example, instead of saying 'no problem,' saying 'it's my pleasure' seems to have a better reception." Her words underscored the importance of genuine compassion in caregiving. Our family provided what we could, but as his condition progressed, we recognized the need for a dedicated team specializing in family-centered care—a resource that simply didn't exist at the time.
My father, who has since passed, became the inspiration for Searchlight Senior Services. I keep a picture of him on the wall next to my desk. Honoring his memory drives my commitment to providing the highest quality care to the seniors we are privileged to assist, which I consider a true blessing. Knowing his generosity and thoughtfulness, it is truly "my pleasure" to offer this support, I only hope my father would feel proud to know his legacy.
My parents, 1994.